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I wanna be a dog, wanna wag my tail,
Chase cars and knock over garbage cans,
Bite the man who brings the mail.
I wanna be a dog, wanna lie on the floor,
Chase squirrels and cats, get fed, get fat,
Chew your shoe and bark at the door.
I wanna be a dog, wanna dig big holes,
Sniff trees and ground and basset hounds
And pee on telephone poles.
I wanna be a dog, wanna drool all around,
Scratch fleas and ticks and run after sticks,
I just wanna be a hound.
I wanna be a dog, wanna roll in the dirt,
Wanna run in the street, get mud on my feet
And jump up onto your shirt.
I wanna have dog breath, wake the neighbors too.
I'll lick your hand, be the best friend to man;
I've got nothing better to do.
I wanna be a dog, I want my nose to be wet.
I've got a college degree now all I wanna be
Is somebody else's pet
- Album:
- Miscellaneous
- Naughty Songs for Boys and Girls
- Family Trip
- Old Dogs, New Tricks
- I Eat Kids and Other Songs for Rebellious Children
- Naughty Songs for Boys & Girls
- A Little Different
- Stanley Stole My Shoelace and Rubbed It In His Armpit and...
- Family Concert
- Captured Live and In the Act
- Old Enough to Know Better: The Worst of Barry Louis Polisar
- Old Enough To Know Better: The Worst of Barry Louis...
- Songs for Well Behaved Children
- Teachers Favorites
- Naturally Sweetened
- Juno
- Juno B-Sides: Almost Adopted Songs
- Songs to Make You Smile
- The Ultimate Chick Flick Soundtrack
- Juno (Music from the Motion Picture) [Deluxe Edition]