Holy Guacamole!
Holy Guacamole!
I just got hit by a car
And you're the one who swept me off my feet
Pushed me in the street
Left me in the cold mud
Guacamole me
Guacamole you
I just got busted for drugs
And you're the one who sold me to the fed
Leaving me for dead
Played me for a fool
Making guacamole
Mix it in the bowl-y
I just got mauled by a bear
And you're the one who covered me in honey
Thought it was so funny
How could you be so cruel
Take it
That's good
Captain Guacamole
Officer Stromboli
I just got shot in the face
And you're the one who had the smoking gun
Love is just no fun
Whenever I'm with you
Guacamole coma
Yuma Arizona
I just got hepatitis C
And you were standing there with a syringe
How it makes me cringe
Breaks my heart in two
Holy Guacamole
Lumpy green and rolly
Baby I wouldn't change a thing
Cause even though I'm down upon my luck
I don't give a fuck
As long as I have you

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