(Ivy) Hey Romeo you comin'
(Jason) In a sec
(Nadia) Congratulations, Romeo. Dad'll be excited
(Jason) Yeah, I'm looking forward to that conversation
(Nadia) Now, don't forget behind every great man is a dim witted sister who just wants to be fed
Nurse! Who knew
I thought for sure I'd get peasant number 8
or jelly spinstress number 3
(Jason) I know you've got more confidence in your acting than that
(Nadia) Oh, I do
I know a girl full of confidence
yes whenever she's full she's a confident girl
she'll have your piece of pie
then inhale another ten
there's a thin girl inside her with twelve of her friends
Hips that could bear you a buffalo
(Jason) Longhorn?
(Nadia) Ass that's vast it could block out the sun
(Jason) You know that you're insane
(Nadia) I'm a caution for the vain
mothers say well dear, theres fat, then theres Jane
Plain Jane fatass
guilty of swallowing Jenny Craig whole
Plain Jane fatass
keeping society so ill at ease
and loving her role
(Jason) Why are you so hard on yourself?
(Nadia) Why are you such an overachiever
(Nadia) Mom (Jason) Dad
(Jason: imitating Mother) Nadia, it's just that I know you'd be happier...
(Nadia: imitating Father) Kiddo, I didn't thousands of dollars on private golf lessons so you could quit the team sophomore year
(Jason) Mind over matter
(Nadia) Keep your mind focused
(Jason) We just want you to be happy
(Nadia) To make us happy
But why can't teh fat girl play Juliet?
It's the plumpest of roles so then why not pick me?
(Jason) It's just a stupid show
(Nadia) Says the dashing Romeo
But I've played a servant four years in a row
But I'll have the last laugh you bet your ass
Hurt me? You can't
I have mounds of thick skin
baby high school doesn't last
and some day I have a hunch
that I'll eat them for breakfast and shit them for lunch
Plain Jane fatass
hungry for love she's a sensative soul.
Plain Jane fatass
keeping society so ill at ease
and loving her role
Dad's birthday package arrived today
two weeks late as usual
here's your birthday cheque
financial proof that dad loves you
and oh surprise
a note
Dear Jason
Please find enclosed
this very thick package that came for you yesterday
I spoke to Father Flynn
and he told me you were in
But call anyway when you open it
Notre Dame!
We always knew that you'd keep the McConnell flame burning
Love Dad.
(Jason) What did Dad get you?
(Nadia) You mean what did his secretary get me?
These earings
I think they're slimming what d'you think?
(Jason) Come here

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