Today I'll start a zine, my views will change the scene
Everything that I write, will surely change their minds
First I will make them laugh and make them want to read
My reviews are excellent, interviews are in-depth
Pictures are glossy and a list of shows
Now I have to sell some ads, so I can make some cash
Production run is now complete, first issue is out
Now I will spread the word, to gain praise of the hard work I have done
Copies are moving fast, issue one is sold out
Promos are piling in, labels want to advertise
Go to shows to promote
Everyday life is getting better, with a shot of beer
Hanging out with the bands I love to hear
On the phone with label reps, boy this life is the best
Working harder, more hours everyday
Magazine is improving in every way
Punctuation is now complete, vocabulary expanded
They love the new me
A few years go by, and still I write
This magazine consumes my life
Always looking for the next big thing
The scene kind of suck
Life is all the same
But still I try to satisfy the readers who subscribe
Every hour dissipates from me
My computer keeps freezing up
Deadlines suck, contributors take forever
Another metal fest, there's never anywhere to sit
Dealing with accountants about bounced checks
Or being bribed for a good review
If I speak my mind you won't like what I've got to say
Same old job, same old house, my life is redundant

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