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Kevin Bloody Wilson
Miscellaneous
Granddads got a stiffy
Granddads got a Stiffy
The old Bastard lay sprawled on the nursinâ home floor
he'd been wankin anâ fell out of his chair,
Anâ as he fell on his guts his colostomy bust
splatterinâ muck an guck an shit everywhere,
It was all up the wall on the matron an all,
it was caked on her apron anâ hair,
And as we ducked for cover that filthy old bugger just sat there with his cock in his hand.
Ah, it couldn't ave been a worse day cos it was his birthday
with the rellies rallied all round his bed,
Absolutely amazed that he'd actually made another birthday cos he should have been dead,
With all that fuckinâ an fightinâ that he'd done in his life, he should have been hung years ago,
By any number of blokes whose missus he's poked with that monster he was strokinâ there now
Ah, Granddads got a stiffy, Granddads got a bone,
Somebody better get Nana in quick, we'd promised her we'd phone
He's OD'd on Viagra, call Grandmother up on the phone,
Granddads got a stiffy, Granddads got a bone.
But he just wouldn't stop wankinâ so we chucked on a blanket,
so the women and kids couldn't see,
His battered banana hanginâ out his pyjamas and the cum stain anâ shit on his sheets,
But that filthy old bastard sat cackling laughinâ, just waving his slug in the air,
And by the look in his eye matron knew it was time,
'EVERYBODY GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE!!'
Cos, Granddads got a stiffy, Granddads got a bone,
Somebody better get nana in quick, we'd promised her we'd phone
Cos Granddads going ballistic, call Grandmother up on the phone,
Granddads got a stiffy, granddads got a bone.
Ah, granddads got a stiffy, Granddads got a bone,
Somebody better get Nana in quick, we'd promised her we'd phone
Heâs pullinâ himself to pieces, call Grandmother up on the phone,
Granddads got a stiffy, Granddads got a bone,
Ah Granddads got a stiffy, Granddads got a bone.
- Album:
- Wrong! Wrong! Wrong!
- Miscellaneous
- the worst of kevin bloody wilson
- Excess All Areas
- Klassic Kev, Vol. 1
- Kalgoorlie Love Songs
- Let Loose Live in the Outback
- 20 Years of Kev
- Born Again Piss Tank
- Your Average Australian Yobbo
- Nashville Trash
- Kristmas Album
- Far Canal
- Backout From The Outback
- Let Loose Live in London
- My Australian Roots
- The Lovable Lauikin
- Adults Only! The Filthiest Party Album in the World
- Dilligaf
- Little Johnny the Movie (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack)