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We were young, young and free, freely bound together
We gazed into each other's eyes, we cried at our wedding
Tears are a funny things, yes a strange token
Even when they spring from joy, they whisper something's broken
Three years in, I made our bed, I made up my mind
I'd bike across the countryside, just to make it mine
Now I can't even say, was I happy or jaded?
Like spilled ink on a diary that blots all the old pages
All my old pages
Oh I didn't think I was running from anything
But there were some things that I couldn't bring myself to think
How I love you became a trite apology
Or how you stiffened when you were touched by me
My heart was dying of a thousand bruises
But I know a guilty heart accuses
Did I dream it all up, oh tell me now
Did you take the slightest pause before you took your vow?
On those days when I saw nobody for hours
I saw your face in patterns of the shriveled springtime flowers
On those nights when the only sound was the hotel AC dying
There through the stillborn air, I could hear you crying
Or were you?
Oh I made so many vows hunched over my Ertegun
My life was a ray, straight-shooting for the rising sun
I'll be clean, I'll be good, I'll treat you right I know
And above all else, I'll go, I'll go
When I was through, life lost its motion
I stayed up all night, drinking and smoking
Waves lapped my feet; I was eroding
I felt the world shift but couldn't control it
When he opened the door I didn't understand