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He's been roundinâ off bolts since the age of fourteen
Was that a five eighths or a nine sixteenths?
He's got a metric socket that don't quite fit
Well it'll wiggle just a little but it ainât quite stripped
The safety guardâs gone from his grinding machine
He got a stiff paint brush he only kinda got clean
He's the hired man, my neighbor and a cousin in law
He's a jerry rigginâ fool, he got the tool for the job
Well it's vise grips for pliers, and pliers for a wrench
A wrench for a hammer, hammers everything else
It just donât seem to make much difference
I sure do like him but heâs hard on equipment
I sure like you son, but youâre hard on equipment
His corners ainât square and his floor ainât level
And he's always had trouble with the old tape measure
His doors donât close âcause the jamb ainât plumb
And heâs a Goddamn menace with an air nail gun
They love to see him cominâ at the lumberyard store
Fixed the leak in his roof with a two by four
Drilled holes in his boards with the wrong kinda bit
And when they donât line up he blames the government
He got the whole front yard full of fix âem up cars
Three donât run and the rest wonât start
Everything's fine with his rebuilt motor
Except of course for the couple spare parts left over
Baler wire tie downs goinâ down the road
On two bald tires and an oversize load
He ain't never read a manual âcause that's like cheatinâ
He don't mind a little grease on his hands while he's eatinâ
Heâs got busted up knuckles, his thumb got bruised
Jesus Christ was a carpenter, too
- Álbum:
- Counterfeit Blues
- Horse Soldier! Horse Soldier!
- Hair In My Eyes Like a Highland Steer
- Five Dollar Bill
- Unforgiving Mistress
- Modern Pain
- Weight of the Gun
- 30 Years of Stony Plain
- 35 Years of Stony Plain
- 40 Years of Stony Plain
- 40 Years of Stony Plain Records
- Cabin Fever
- Cabin Fever Deluxe
- Cabin Fever (Deluxe Version)
- Cabin Fever (Deluxe Edition)
- This Is My Prairie (Live from CCMA Awards 2010)