Alitor realm of grief

I cannot
Escape from claws of lunacy
They are
Hunting me since I was born
Throughout life I've been searching for
A bit of light, a bit of hope
Living seems so strange, difficult
This life and what we are all born for
Hypocrisy is everywhere, I am trapped
I don't want to live anymore
So much hatred is sown in me
I'm vanishing into the realm of grief
In front of others' suffering
I turn my head around
I swallow my shame
And I become
I become one of them
Every human trait has been lost
Conscience abandoned, the line has been crossed
Afraid of judgement
I've lost myself
The dream of better times
Disappeared