Maybe if I would have known about the life I choose
I would have re-thought my decision Maybe even dispose
The thoughts of being involved with this life at all
But I would rather feel pain, than feel nothing at all
I push on, I've lost it for way too long
I will not betray whats kept me alive so far
It's amazing to see just how many lives I've touched
From the words that I speak and I'll never give that up
I'm tired of living in hell on Earth
The crazy thing about it, is it could be so much worse
I've watched toddlers eat dirt, somewhere in a third world
With a smile on their face, just because they got to eat
God Damn
Is my life that bad
I've witnessed my dad quit crack
And my moms been dying, but at least shes alive
Everything seems better when I close my eyes
I don't want to sleep forever
Can't seem to open up my eyes
I just wish things would get better
I just want to enjoy my life
I just go to sleep when I feel the pain
When I fade to black it all gets erased
And every time I wake it's too hard to see
And too much to take so I'd rather dream
I don't want to sleep forever
Can't seem to open up my eyes
Even with open eyes, I never feel alive
Bottle the pain inside and hide from the light
Too afraid to try, I'm holding back my life
But too afraid to die, I'd never sacrifice
Myself to these demons inside
Distracted but keeping in mind
That I'm all out of time and if I dont provide
I'll end up in the ground, I refuse to let all of you down
Alive today that's more than some can say
The fact that I can breathe, gives me a chance to speak
And when I blurt these words, you gain a piece of me
It's common decency, because unbelievably
You give to me, so I give back
I used to used music to distract
Now I'm doing what I'm doing for anyone under weather
Relate to my movement, were in the rain together.
I don't want to sleep forever
Can't seem to open up my eyes
I just wish things would get better
I just want to enjoy my life
I just go to sleep when I feel the pain
When I fade to black it all gets erased
And every time I wake it's too hard to see
And too much to take so I'd rather dream
I don't want to sleep forever
Can't seem to open up my eyes