For coughs and colds and scabby holes
Itchy pimples, unseemly moles
For funny turns and chinese burns
For aching heads we're most concerned
For staying lively getting it nightly
This we guarantee
That's ultranol here's the new remedy
Before you go to bed take 2 or 3
When you wake up you'll feel better
For aches and pains and jellied brains
Help you sleep and smile again
They're aimless blameless almost nameless
You get much more all though you pay less
Revitalise that sexual drive
In fact be born again
Yes ultranol will put you on the map
Take 4 or 5 then have a little nap
When you wake up you'll feel better
For coughs and colds and your scabby holes
Keep you young although you are feeling old
If you're not protected you're gonna get it
So suck them and see you won't regret it
Suck them and see