I'm the guy you didn't invite to your party, but I'm already drunk.
Already broke somethin'.
I'm sorry, I hope it's alright that I smoke.
Alrighty then I'll just go and throw it in the garbage can and start it on fire.
I'm retarded.
Tell me, why aren't we friends?
What's the reason I aren't invited to parties again?
Is it because of the orange Cardigan sweater I'm in?
Rockin' sweat pants and walkin 'round here harder than sin?
Already finished all of your gin, barcardi and then got caught frolicking with your momma's daughter again?
Sorry brah, ya oughtta know the harlot followed me into the bathroom, offered me all of your klonopin and got on the floor and upzipped drawers and started to lick balls then opened up her thick jaw and swallowed my dick.
Plus more, but honestly I don't recall it a bit.
Think I'm in love and you gon' be my new brother in law and shit!
I wasn't invited to the party, but I'm comin'
It's Friday night and I just drank a bottle of rum and as long as bitches are here and that fridge full of beer, then I ain't leavin'.
Best believe I'm still gon' be here in the mornin'!
There's a turd in the punch bowl and I'm the one that put it there.
Never thought I woulda dared.
I ain't think you woulda cared.
Never thought you'd get so fuckin' mad at me you woulda teared me a new asshole when you put your whole foot in there.
I ain't mean to cause a problem, but I coulda sweared that was the toilet and it's apparent I'm a bit impaired.
I'm prepared to party hardy til the early A.
Like Ah damn, wake up naked with your aunt Pam.
Wham, bam, thank you, ma'am.
Help me find my pants.
I've come to kick it like I'm Van Dam.
Maybe do a hammer dance, slam a few of them cans of cold brew and pick a fight with the biggest dude a man can.
My attitude is I do what ever I wanna and when I'm in a bad mood, you know that I'm gonna get drunk and raise hell.
Fuck it, man may as well grab some pale ale, get loose like a hang nail!
I drank a 12 pack and a bottle of Jack and then I washed it down with a bottle of Crown and after 6 swallows from a bottle of Skol, then I was lookin' for my pockets and was wantin' some more.
I only party on the daily and party till I drop and get so drunk Rosie O Donnel's lookin' hot!
The party ain't over homie, pour me another shot.
Only one hands full and it ain't the only one I got.
You say I drink a lot?
Well you don't drink enough.
So raise your fuckin' cups, get drunk, and shut the fuck up!
Get fucked up and dance in a drunken chant to this mother fuckin chant till ya lose your pants.
Wake up in the front yard full of aluminum cans.
Butt naked with a Bud Light still in your right hand.
Fuck a hangover, we gettin' drunk again.
This is how we do it, it's like 7A.
M., baby!